One of the most important things about cultivating a devotional practice is coming to know oneself, and specifically one’s mental processes and how they help or harm the ability to come into a focused state when engaging in prayer, meditation, spiritual-practice-related reading, and so on.
With the disruptions over the past few months, the thing that I have really come to appreciate is how important a journaling practice is for me. Just as meditation helps me focus my mind and find the center of the hurricane, my journaling practice prevents me from too much word vomiting, oversharing, and just generally not engaging in measured speech. This isn’t something that I’ve noticed due to journaling diligently, but it’s something that comes to the forefront when I think about times (like this week) when I’ve struggled to find the time in the morning because my routine is slightly off, and I’m scrambling as a result of the lack. Of course, this week, I was also dealing with wildfire smoke-triggered headaches (very unexpected given that I don’t get those from bonfires or incense, just from secondhand cigarette smoke), so most of the week has a surreal vibe to it. And I don’t think I went to bed on time a single day this week. But it would have definitely been better had I been journaling.
Part of the reason my routine needs some calming down is that the cats and I have only been together for a month, and there are some times when I’m a bit slow to get out of bed because Koiya wants “you’re awake!” affection and I want to treasure those moments — they’re times I remember about all of my former, now-deceased cats. And then there’s Everly (yes, “Ever” is evolving), who has a Never Pee Alone campaign — she demands attention whenever I’m in the bathroom: using the toilet, brushing my teeth, applying moisturizer or sunscreen, doing ear piercing aftercare, &c.,,, unless I’m actively using the shower. That re-negotiation of time when others are present is something that we all have to deal with. If it’s not cats, it’s roommates or children or partners or visitors &c. It’s easy to get frustrated even though we enjoy the time with the people we like and love. We miss the elements of our routines that we know we need, and that fixation on the stressful lack is almost worse than just not doing the practice at all. It’s important to prioritize our relationships of all kinds along the spectrum from the Gods to the embodied other.
When I do journal — like today, a day I’ve taken off because my excess vacation days are expiring soon — the entries are far longer than normal, and there’s a lot more stress in them. The pent-up mental restlessness impacts how ready I am to be at my household shrine — that bird-in-a-cage-in-my-chest feeling — until the prayers start and things relax (because I do suddenly relax, as if with lighting the candles and welcoming the Gods, sudden fresh and crisp air calms me), and I’m able to use the techniques from meditation to center my mind on the devotional practice. It’s similar to how, when I have to reschedule my morning meditation for later (like a midmorning work break), that lack of starting the day with a solid foundation sets me up for failure, and it will inevitably be one of those low-productivity days with a lot of self-directed frustration. I’ve learned in those times that doing a two-minute guided breathing exercise in the Calm app is a far better stopgap than doing nothing.
Mental hygiene isn’t something that everyone needs to do in the exact same way or for the exact same amount of time. It really depends on your own context, both in terms of what you need and what you can do. I’m a slow-morning morning person and need about two and a half hours to do a routine that would probably take most people one to one and a half hours, likely just due to what my nervous system needs.
If you’re engaging in devotional practice and you also have that caged-bird feeling sometimes in the mornings just imagining the journey from waking to heading out the door, if your restlessness leads to pacing and overthinking and maybe to too much talking, adding journaling and other types of calming activities can really make a difference. While we can probably bin some of this self-care into templates based on personality, the only way to figure it out is to try a lot of things and commit to what sticks. Maybe you need a run first thing, or some yoga or therapy ball or foam roller work, or a deep meditation, or journaling, or a commitment to take your meds, or something else in your mental wellness potion. A lot of the backlash against these nourishing activities is that, on social media, there’s often a sense that you have to do absolutely everything and that whatever Influencers selling products through product placement morning routine videos are doing is the absolute ideal. Deep down, we all know that there are no shortcuts to actually dealing with ourselves, and there are no external proxy persons who can do the work for us.
For my part, I’m going to set my alarm a bit earlier now that I know my mornings are slower — it will make those moments in bed after my alarm being greeted by Koiya a bit sweeter, and when Everly is underfoot in the bathroom, I’ll be able to give her more attention, too. Committing to the mental hygiene to prep for prayer and an engaged and pious day makes this all even more worth it.
I hope that this post has been a helpful reflection that gets you thinking about your own devotional practice and how it is enriched and supported by mental wellness.
KALLISTI 