Some Thoughts

For the first time, my state allowed early voting. I was fairly sure that standing for a while in line on election day would not be adhering to the guidelines that my surgeon had set down, so I took advantage of that option. While I had hopes that I was wrong and that we would have a woman in the White House before I’m well into retirement (my best hunch, and I suspect she would be a VP who assumes power after a death or incapacitation), my doubts were accurate. Due to both having surgery and having voted so far in advance of the actual election, I wasn’t glued to checking voting results. Because I’m taking care of myself post-surgery, I was absolutely wiped by 7:30 PM, and I wound down for bed. I think having surgery a week before the election was one of the best decisions I have ever made. My emotions the next day were fairly muted because I reflexively got some feelings out via pacing and then had to deal with bad abdominal cramping. I had to use cold packs.

Still, there are some things that I am definitely worried about — for instance, is it true that the incoming administration is going to send the military into my state come January like they said they would? — and I am an unmarried and childless gay cat lady.

There are many what-if scenarios, but the arrow of time only crystallizes into one path.

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I want to say a bit more about why I think it will be 30-40 years before we directly elect a woman for President. Culturally, America hates women with an insidiousness that is pervasive and poisonous. As a case in point, a certain percentage of the people reading the previous two sentences are thinking something like, “No, it’s not about women, it’s about this woman, and [lists reasons].” Except they ultimately make that list about every woman. Women are dissected and stripped apart for the slightest infractions or deviations from what people want us to do. As a second way to drive this home, have you noticed how, in the pagan and polytheist communities, more and more of the authors who are gushed over are not women despite the historical gender ratio of people in pagan and polytheistic spheres? (It’s becoming like library science, where 80% are women, but only 50% of managers are women. An equitable ratio would match the professional composition.) Have you noticed that, when people have out-there views (of various kinds, benign or weird or horrible), women are lashed for it and destroyed faster and with more vehemence than anyone else? Have you noticed that people who make disclaimers about why they still read someone’s work even though [x, y, z] happened, they’re usually talking about a man? The same people who do this will gush about their commitment to gender equality. It’s not about women, they say, but about that woman.

When this was driven home for me a few years ago, I actually changed my entire strategy for interacting with people. My main goal isn’t to be recognized for my own work, despite what you may think by me writing this blog or self-publishing stories or writing that spiritual primer. It’s to communicate ideas and hope that a man repeats them and is credited with them so they gain traction. The ideas are more important than me, so that was a logical decision even if I dislike it.

Somewhere, aloud or in writing, I have mentioned that I was once listening to a podcast episode about Plato’s Republic. Two of the people on the episode were men, and the third was a young woman, a scholar who had just finished one of her capstone projects at whatever level she had been studying at. One of the men asked her what she thought about the statements in the dialogue about women. She hesitated when she responded. It wasn’t something she had focused on at all.

Many women are well aware that we face significantly more challenges in life to be seen as worthy of the label human, even provisionally. The women who are not aware of this have usually retreated into a sense of learned helplessness, frequently because they’re in controlling relationships where they twist and contort their sense of right and wrong to conform to whatever the men in their life want, even when the men are doing something immoral or have a twisted worldview. Sometimes, it’s because of the disconnect between (a) women raised in parts of the world or sections of a country where the social norms are more relaxed and (b) women raised in stricter areas, at least until they transgress in some way and learn that a slightly bigger cage is still a cage. If a woman does not thread the needle properly, the punishments from society are severe, even after the gains in rights we have experienced over the past 150 years, such as being able to own property, to vote, and to have our own checking accounts and credit cards without a husband or father’s permission, despite coverture still not being completely overturned. She may have done something totally benign but socially fraught, or she may have done something that is actually wrong or morally twisted. It doesn’t matter.

I understand, and I think many people reading the Republic understand, that being in such a constrained and precarious position in an incarnation is great for developing self-discipline and grit. Proclus even wrote somewhere that women who do the philosophical thing frequently outshine men. The reason for that is that we have so many more challenges at baseline to overcome that it’s like we’re training in the gym with heavier weights from the start. And it will continue to be that way for the foreseeable future. While it may be inspiring spiritually to know that nailing self-discipline and working hard will lead to great gains in theurgic practice and Platonic understanding because there is no glass ceiling there, on a civic level, there is a glass ceiling regardless of how hard we work, and that disconnect is discouraging.

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Ultimately, to circle back to current events, and especially the prevailing circumstances that led to where we are: There is a line from the Merlin miniseries from 1998 that made a strong impression on me as a child even though I grew to dislike the show overall — paraphrased, the reign that begins in blood will end the same way. There is a lot of blood in the ground we walk on. Unfortunately, America lacks the spiritual understanding to commission what should be done in a ritual setting, and that is part of why even when people try with best intentions to tackle pressing and important social issues, it is twisted into something else. To tackle these structural wrongs with efficacy requires an auspicious beginning. Instead, America grows corn and cults of all varieties.

As much as I sincerely believe that much of what is happening is due to the explosively toxic effect of algorithmic polarization and radicalization on all points of the political ideology spectrum, the spiritual layer of what has happened cannot be ignored. Other people on the polytheist blogosphere are making calls to deepen in prayer, and I think that that advice is very important. I also recommend doing compassion meditation. However, I have no idea how to address the enagēs situation on a smaller scale than nationally. That is for someone with more experience and connections than I could ever have to figure out.

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Be well, and may the Gods guide you to whatever is most good.